The Hanukkah Games
by PrincessAurorus
Summary: Kyle manages to join the Hunger Games on Christmas Eve. But can he win in time to celebrate Hanukkah?
1. Lonely Jew on Christmas

**This is a South Park Christmas Special starring Kyle Broflovski. To note that there are some Christmas references in this episode such as: Twas the Night Before Christmas, It's a Wonderful Life, How The Grinch Stoled Christmas, The Polar Express, Frosty the Snowman, Sesame Street, and Elmo Saves Christmas. Now Trey and Parker noted that this is the first time ever that Kyle had his own christmas special and of Jimmy is going to have one on the halloween special.**

* * *

_Twas the Day before Christmas Eve, when all through the house. Not a creature was stirring not even a mouse._

_The stockings were by the chimney with care, in hopes that Saint Nicholas soon will be there. A Jew with an orange jacket came down without a racket._

_He looked at the stockings and went out the door, and sledded down and sang like he did before._

(The song, A Lonely Jew on Christmas [Clean Version], plays as Kyle walks and rides on the sled until Carrie Underwood joins in)

_**It's hard to be a Jew on Christmas. My friends won't let me join in there games. I can't sing Christmas Songs or decorate the Christmas Tree or leave water out for Rudolph and there's something wrong with me. My people don't believe in Jesus Christ divinity. I'm a Jew, a lonely Jew on Christmas. Hanukkah is **__**nice but why is it that Santa passes over my house every year. And instead of eating ham I have to eat kosher latkes. Instead of 'Silent Night' I'm singing 'Hu Hagtol Gavish'. And what the heck is up with lighting all the silky candles, tell me please? I'm a Jew, a lonely jew. I can't be merry, cause I'm Hebrew on Christmas. (Carrie's verse) Hey there, Kyle. I can't help hear. You're feeling left out of Christmas cheer. But I've come to see that you shouldn't be sad cause this is the month you should be glad. Because it's nice to be a Jew on Christmas. You don't have to deal with this season at all. (Kyle's last verse for the entire song) I don't have to be on my best behavior or give to charity. I don't have to spend some time with my jewish family. And I don't have to see Santa and have his breath over me. I'm a Jew, a styling Jew. It's a good time to be Hebrew on Christmas.**_

(The song ends with Kyle's mom hugging her son with love)

_The Jewish Child went back home at 5 with his mother, who's hair looks like a beehive._

Sheila: Sweetie, how was your day in the snow. Did you do anything? Tell Me! I want to know.

_The Jewish Child still had nothing to say. He was certainly tired after that chilly day._

Kyle: What the hell are talking about, mom? Is it because I lighten up a bomb?

Sheila: No, sweetheart. It's because it's this time. It is okay if we don't have to talk in rhyme.

Kyle: Well... If we must- except that damn narrator who interrupts us every single time.

Sheila: It seems to me that Christmas is tomorrow and I'm bringing Ike over to see Santa Claus.

Kyle: What? Why bring him over to visit with Santa? Besides, The Hanukkah Games is Tomorrow!

Sheila: Because he's not jewish unlike us.

Kyle: Retarded thing to say, mom. You know he's gay than usual. Tomorrow is Christmas Eve, right?

Sheila: Yes, son. Don't insult your brother like that, he can't handle you saying that kind of stuff.

Kyle: Fine... The Hanukkah Games does remind me of the Hunger Games with other jewish children.

Gerald: Son, you feeling alright?

Kyle: Just fine, dad. Just f*ing fine! (Grumbles)

Gerald: I can absolutely care about you being unhappy over Christmas...

Sheila: I need to do some training over the avenue, tomorrow. And be good to your brother while we're gone.

Kyle: Okay, mom. God... I'm heading towards Cartman's before this.


	2. Getting Super Ready

_The young boys hearts were filled with love and cheer because Christmas Day is almost here. They kept very busy with wrapping and baking. Fine presents for parents and cakes they were making. As Cartman place a tie for his new tux, the Jew with Red Hair came by with 6 bucks._

Cartman: Kyle, thank god, what a pleasant surprise. I didn't expected you in a quarter after five.

Kyle: You fat ass! I came around house and you've gave me this! (Shows 6 dollars) I can't believe you hated me...

Cartman: Yes... The others are doing fine down with a peck.

Kyle: How did you know about it, fat ass?

Cartman: Get Out Of My (Beep) House!

(Kyle leaves Cartman's House)

Kyle: No wonder I never visited him due to him being like this...

(The song 'We're Going Home For The Holidays' plays with all the children)

_**We're going home for the holidays by train, by bus, by car. We're going home for the holidays! We're traveling also far! (Wendy's verse) I'll make some cookies Mom and Dad. They love to eat them all. (Craig's verse) I'll make this stocking for my sister and I'll hang it on the wall. (The Kids' verse) We're going home for the holidays by train, by bus, by car. We're going home for the holidays! We're traveling also far! (Bebe's Verse) I'll knit some sweaters for Mom and Dad. Their favorite color is blue. (Stan's verse) And I'll make this picture for my parents. The best I ever drew. (The Children' verse)We're going home for the holidays to meet with those we love. We're going home for the holidays! (Sheila's Interruption) Who forgot a glove? (The Kid's [Except for Shiela Broflovski] final verse) We're going home for the holidays. We're happy as can be! Cause there's other than the old holidays to BE WITH- Family!**_

_Before going home, a friend came along. He wondered where the Jew knew the song._

Kyle: I didn't know that, Cartman kick me out of his house.

Stan: What the hell are you talking about, Kyle?

Kyle: Cartman tried explaining, but he was a (Beep)!

Stan: Oh really? Geez, that's too bad, Kyle. Why don't you celebrate Christmas anyway?

Kyle: I am Jewish for now reason and would've been regular like you are right now...

Sheila: Sweetie! Time to have your bread!

Kyle: Just a second... Hurry, Ike!

Butters: Hey! Where're you guys going?

Kyle: We are going home until we meet Santa tomorrow.

Ike: Yeah! I'm getting see Santa Claus!

_Then, it came time to break their to break their bread-_

(The boys eats their bread)

_And brush their teeth-_

(The boys brush their teeth)

_And go to bed._

(The boys went to sleep as Sheila closes the door and the cold wind blew)

_That night, the Jew could not sleep, thinking about Christmas in his heart deep. Dawn came at last and didn't shine steep._

Kyle: Brother, wake up.

Ike: Hmmm?

Kyle: Tell our parents to get up because it is time to see Santa.

_After waking their parents, they let Ike go with applause. And after breakfast, they finally met, Santa Claus._

Santa: Ho Ho Ho! What do you want for Christmas?

Ike: I want a stuffed teddy bear!

Santa: Okay, sugarplum!

(Ike giggles with the candy cane and Kyle starts grumbling)


End file.
